Disclaimer: I don't own 'em, the WB does, I like to write about them, yadda yadda yadda. I dont own one scene where Ani is going back to the past and Prue dies, that is the WB's. I dont own/ didnt write the song by the googoodolls... That was written by them. I do however own, Ani, Shawn, the twins, Sarah, and sort of Melinda... Please dont copy unless you have my permission.

Forgotten but not gone
You drink it off your mind
You talk about the world
Like it's someplace that you've been
You choke down all your anger
Forget your only son
You pray to statues when you sober up for fun
You're anger don't impress me
The world slapped in your face
It always rains like hell on the loser's day parade
- Goo goo dolls


She ran into the closet, breathing heavily. Breaking down, the little girl clutched her knees and cried. Piper listened through the door, sighing. No four year old had to go through this, no one at any age should have had to go through this. She slightly turned the knob of the tall wood door and let herself in.
“It’s me,” She whispered. “It’s Piper.”
The little girl flung herself at Piper who enveloped her in a hug. “A-aunt Pipe.” Her tiny body shook as she buried her head into Piper’s stomach.
“Baby, what happened?” Piper asked, gently, smoothing the girl’s light brown hair. “Sarah, you know you can tell me anything. I won’t hurt you.” Piper held her little niece in her arms.
Sarah looked up with those big puppy dog eyes. “It was mommy.” That was what Piper had been afraid of, Phoebe.
“What exactly did mommy do?” She could see the fear in the child’s eyes, even in the dark.
“She-she huwt me bad.” Sarah took a breath and began to cry again. Piper hoisted her niece into her arms and took her out into the light. She saw a big bruise on the side of Sarah’s face that was purple and swollen.
“Sar, sweetie… Oh my.” Piper hadn’t been expecting this. At times before, Phoebe hadn’t really hurt her daughter. She just gave her some emotional scars or a small tap. Never had it been anything this big.
“She was acting diffwent again.” Sarah’s small arms wrapped around Piper’s neck even more tightly.
“Honey, you have to understand that mommy isn’t herself when this kind of stuff happens. The real ‘mommy’ would be devastated if she knew what she was doing.”
“Then why is she doing this?” Sarah looked hurt, and confused.

Phoebe chose to blast through the foyer at this moment, a beer bottle in her hand. Piper gasped, clutching Sarah harder and trying to run up the stairs.
“Whatja doing sis?” Phoebe looked like a mess, her hair rumpled and cheeks too bright.
“Phoebe stop!!! You’re not like this; this is because of—
“What this is because of is NONE of your business. I happen to like myself this way. No one likes the old mopey stupid Phoebe. Anyhow, what the hell are you doing with MY daughter??” Phoebe’s voice came out slurred and she swayed.
“I don’t think you should be doing anything with your daughter when you’re in this condition.” Piper tried to stay calm, she felt Sarah’s little fingers dig deeper into her neck.
“I can and I will.” Phoebe reached out to Sarah, who flinched.
Piper stepped up the stairs, “Leo!” Phoebe touched Sarah’s bruise with her free hand and pressed on it till she cried out. “Leo!!! Come down here this instant!” Piper closed her eyes with relief when she heard the familiar sound of orbing. “Leo, Phoebe’s gotten worse,” she nodded towards Phoebe’s head.
“Oh god, Piper honey, you take Sarah upstairs to be with Mel and the boys. I’ll take care of this.” Leo pointed upstairs, “Go now!”
She ran up the stairs and into Mel and Sarah’s room. She found her sons, Wyatt and Chris eavesdropping at the door. “Boys,” She snapped. “Look, it is not good to listen to other people’s conversation. Now, I might tell you what happened later, but you have to be mature about it.” She sounded mad, but hugged her two sons in relief that they were okay. She looked at Sarah who was absolutely still in her arms. “Baby girl, I think you should go to bed.” She let Sarah down in her “big girl” bed and pulled the covers up to her chin. Before she went to tuck in Melinda, she whispered, “Honey I will keep you safe. But I promise to you, that mommy will be better soon.” She turned off the light in the girls’ room and motioned the boys out. She could hear Leo orbing Phoebe out in a rage.
“Where is daddy going?” Chris asked, his brown eyes wide. Wyatt turned his own green ones up at her. “What’s wrong?” Piper’s sons were six and seven, but they were not born yesterday. They figured that something was terribly wrong and that it had to do with aunt Phoebe. She kneeled down on the floor next to them, cold wood icing her knees. “Phoebe is in a bad place right now…”
“Is it cause of Uncle Luke?” Wyatt asked.
“Yeah. It is. Look, she’s been drinking this stuff—
“Like a potion?” Chris asked.
“Yeah, it’s sort of like a potion. One that changes who you are and how you act. See Phoebe’s been sad lately and even though it really doesn’t, Phoebe thinks this “potion” will make her feel happy. Do you understand?”
“I guess.” Chris said.
“I know this is hard of me to ask, but I want you not to stay around your aunt Phoebe until she gets better. I know you love her but I also know, that Phoebe would be very sad if she hurt any of you guys. Kapeesh?”
“Kapeesh!” Both the boys said, loudly.
She smiled, ruffled the boys’ hair and led them into their room. They both got into their beds and Piper kissed Chris on the forehead. “Ew! Sloppy kiss!” Chris said, even though he looked like he liked it, then Wyatt who laughed and agreed with Chris.
“I love you.” She whispered, turning off the light. And they were fast asleep.

Piper sat on Phoebe’s bed looking out the window for a long time. This was like Phoebe. When Phoebe was in her rebellious teenager stage, she had had a lot of problems with drugs and even a little alcohol. Piper hated it; she remembered when her baby sister would come home at one in the morning, smelling like weed and Prue would yell at her. She remembered the endless nights hearing Prue and Grams scream and not help Phoebe at all. Prue would pour out her problems to Piper and Piper would try to help Phoebe, just like she would try to help Phoebe now. Except this time, she would succeed.

“Piper.” Piper woke on Phoebe’s bed, Leo holding an unconscious Phoebe. Leo placed her on the bed and sighed. “Where did you take her?”
“I took her to a place where she could get all that energy out without hurting anyone.” Leo looked angry and sad for Phoebe. “Do you think it’s safe that she still live here?”
“Leo! How can you say that? This is my sister. We’re not going to just give up on her. Okay?” Piper did not look up at Leo, all the while she kept her eyes trained on Phoebe’s limp form.
“But what about the kids?” Leo asked.
“The kids will be safe, and when Phoebe is like this we can always take them next-door.” Next-door was where Piper’s two other sisters, Paige and Ani lived. She hadn’t told them of Phoebe’s newest “adventure” yet, because it was too late in the night to be stressed.
“Honey, we can’t always take them there.”
“She’s not going to be like this forever Leo. She’s only been like this since Luke died ok? We can help her.” Piper stroked Phoebe’s now pale face.
“I know, look you’re right. I love Phoebe too. We’re gonna help her. We’re gonna do whatever it takes.” Leo pulled Piper into a tight hug. Piper leaned against his strong body, leaving tearstains on his blue plaid shirt.

Phoebe stirred in her bed, her head felt like she had just hit it with a two-ton baseball bat. She opened her eyelids, which felt way too heavy. Piper was sleeping next to her and Leo was sleeping in the chair next to the bed. She tried to sit up, but every part of her body felt as if she were dying- slowly. Piper’s eyes flickered open, “Phoebe?”
Phoebe’s voice rasped, “Piper.” She knew this was a result of a serious hangover. “What happened?”
Piper looked angry but hugged her sister. “Pheebs, this drinking has got to stop.”
“I know, I know, but what did I do? Did I h-hurt anyone?” Even Phoebe knew that when she got drunk, people tended to get hurt.
Piper tried not to look her sister in the eye, “Sarah.”
Phoebe shook her head vigorously, “And?”
“You only bruised her. But Phoebe, she’s scared and you know what dammit? She should be. I know how horrible it is, for you. He died, Phoebe. But that was in that past and you’ve got to focus on your future, Sarah. Her daddy died and suddenly she thinks her mom hates her. Phoebe, she’s only four, she blames herself.” Piper knew this time she had to be frank, she and Phoebe had been skating around this subject since Luke died.
“I never meant to hurt her. I love her.” Phoebe sounded crushed.
“Honey, I know that. You’ve always loved Sarah and always will. But look, she doesn’t know that. She needs to know that. She’s the only part of Luke left.” Piper wrapped her arms around her little sister.
Phoebe sat up, wincing as she did. “I know. I’m going to try so hard to stop, but… Every time I’ve tried I can’t and… I don’t know.”
“Would it help if I took you to AA meetings or something?”
Phoebe gave Piper a weak smile, “That’s ok. Maybe if it does get worse.”
“Alright.”
“Do you think Sarah can forgive me?” Phoebe’s brown eyes had tears in them.
“Sweetie, Sarah’s four, it’s easy to forget but it’s also easy to remember. You just have to let her feel safe and loved.” Piper kissed her sister’s forehead. “By the way, if you need any hangover healing, Paige is the one you go to.” Paige had been a big help in this situation, she herself having alcohol problems before. She had given Phoebe advice on how to stop; so far it hadn’t been working.
“Piper, I want to know, when do you think this all started? When exactly?”
“Why?”
“I just sort of want to take steps back.”
“Well, the first time I ever really saw you like this was about a week after Luke died. I had picked up Sarah and the boys from school and you were sitting at the kitchen table with a bottle of gin. You sure did swear a lot in front of the kids and you and I had some kind of fight.”
“I don’t know why I got so hooked.”
“Babe, you were angry. Do you remember how angry I was when Prue died?”
“Yeah.”
“Well you were that angry and I’m sure you still are.”
“Maybe.” Phoebe’s voice quieted to a barely audible whisper.
Trying to lighten up the mood, Piper smiled and pointed at Leo, “Wow, that man can sure sleep through anything.”
“That’s for sure.” Phoebe giggled weakly.

Phoebe stood in front of Paige, Ani, and Ani’s husband, Shawn trying to explain herself. They knew, they understood, but this addiction had been going on for several months and Phoebe did not know how to stop.
“Honey, it’s hard, I know. I remembered when James died and I felt all alone. Like life didn’t care about me anymore. Maybe like no one wanted me anymore. But I had support and so do you. You’ve got your whole family and we’re all here to love you and help you.” Ani gave Phoebe an understanding smile, her blue eyes sad.
“Thanks, I’m happy you care so much.” Phoebe hugged Ani, surprised because Ani never usually spoke her feelings. Paige came in with one of her famous “hangover healers”, which was a drink with nasty ingredients but it did work. Phoebe took a sip and made a face. “Ew, Paige, what did you put in this stuff?” Phoebe knew that it would work instantly because she drank them almost every day before work.
“You’ve got no right to complain, girl. If it weren’t for those things, you would never be able to stand.” Paige smiled at her sister and patted her on the back.
“You’re right, I shouldn’t complain. I have been a complete bitch.”
“Well, can’t say you haven’t.” Piper laughed, as Chris came running down the stairs with Sarah. One look at Phoebe and they both ran off.
“Did I hurt Chris too?” Phoebe asked.
“Well, no.” Piper started.
“Then why is he running away from me too? Did he see me hurt Sarah?” Phoebe became a bit panicky; she didn’t want two of her family members to hate her.
“No.”
“Well why is my nephew scared of me?”
“He isn’t scared of you… He’s just running off because… Promise you won’t get mad?”
“I can’t promise anything.”
“Well… I sorta told Chris not to go near you—
“Are you serious?” Phoebe felt the anger rushing to her head.
“I don’t want him or any of the kids to get hurt.” Piper sighed.
“I’m not gonna hurt them anymore. I’m not drunk right now, Piper. So why is he leaving?”
“Look I’ll tell him that it’s ok to hang—
“Piper! How could you! He’s my nephew; I love him. Did you tell any of the other kids?”
“Well… I told Wyatt. But honey, don’t take it personally.”
“How the hell can I not?? Tell me exactly what you said to them.”
“All I said was that you were drinking a “potion” that made you different and I don’t know…. I said I would tell him when you were better.”
Phoebe rolled her eyes, “Piper I can’t believe you.”
“Chris, Sarah! Come out! We need to talk to you.” Ani and Paige went into the kitchen and led the kids out into the foyer where Piper and Phoebe stood. Chris looked confused and Sarah looked scared.
Phoebe reached out to her daughter. “Baby girl,” she whispered. She wanted to hug her baby and tell her that everything would be okay. The wound on Sarah’s face had been healed, but her heart hadn’t.
Sarah’s eyes lightened, “is it the-the weal mommy?”
Phoebe slowly walked up to her, “I’m better right now, baby. I love you.” Phoebe took Sarah and lifted her up in her arms. She could feel Sarah’s heartbeat and she stroked her damp brown hair. “Everything I did, or have done. It really is not me.”
“Why d’you do it?” Sarah asked; her eyes were so innocent.
“Baby, how ‘bout we go into another room?” Phoebe went upstairs, into Melinda and Sarah’s room. She took Sarah past Melinda’s crib and to the bed. “I have been different lately huh?”
Sarah nodded her head, “Mama you been mean.”
“Baby, I don’t mean to be mean. It’s just, I’ve been sad lately.” Phoebe sighed, taking Sarah’s hand in her own and stroked it.
“Aunt Pipe told me it was cause of daddy.” Sarah fidgeted with a toy.
“Yeah, its cause of daddy.”
“Is it cause daddy’s gone?” Sarah asked, sad even though she didn’t quite understand the concept.
“Daddy’s not gone, he’s in your heart and he always will look after you and me.” Phoebe tapped her heart.
“Then why don’t I evew see daddy?”
“He’s invisible, but don’t worry he’s still there and he loves you baby. He loves his princess just like I do.” She offered Sarah a comforting smile.
“Mommy, I miss daddy.” Sarah grabbed Phoebe’s hand with a tiny sticky hand.
Phoebe squeezed back, “I miss daddy too, sweetheart.”
“I miss you too.” When Phoebe heard that, her heart broke. Here was her daughter, her only baby and Phoebe had been living right in the same house, yet Sarah missed her. Obviously she’d been mega different since Luke died. Obviously when Phoebe was out there being depressed, she forgot about one special little girl who was her only life. The only part of Luke she had left, and her mom had abandoned that girl. Phoebe cried and cried, “I am so sorry baby.”
“Mama why you crying?” She asked, looking concerned.
“Because I forgot the one person who meant most to me and that is you. Sweetie pie, I love you.” Phoebe hugged Sarah kissing her on the head. “And baby, I missed me too.”

“Are you sure you want to do this?” Ani asked Phoebe. What Phoebe had requested was going to be hard, especially for Phoebe.
“Yes. If I don’t do this I really could get drunk again, and I don’t wanna take that chance.”
“Ok, here goes.” Ani brushed aside her long brown hair and held Phoebe’s hand. The two were going into Phoebe’s past.

“Wait, Phoebe just tell me what you want to say.” Luke and past Phoebe were sitting at a restaurant.
“Champagne?” A nearby waiter asked.
“No thanks.” Past Phoebe sighed.
“Since when do you turn down champagne?” Luke asked past Phoebe.
“Uh, I’m not in the mood for alcoholic beverages.” The waiter slowly descended from the table.
“So what were you saying before the waiter came?” Luke asked.
“I was saying… Um, Luke… How would you feel if…” Past Phoebe paused. “I said I was pregnant.”
“Oh my god. Baby, you’re pregnant?” Luke took past Phoebe’s hand in his.
“Yeah, I am!” Past Phoebe smiled and kissed Luke.

Ani looked at Phoebe to see her reaction. Phoebe had tears streaming down her cheeks. “I really miss him.” She said.

“Pipe!!! Oh my god! How the hell did you survive this with two kids?” Past Phoebe screamed. “It hurts so friggin bad.”
“I know!” Piper smiled.
“Shut-up.” Phoebe growled.
“Just one more push.” Luke coached.
“I can’t!!!” Past Phoebe’s hair was matted and her face was covered in sweat.
“Come on honey!” Prue encouraged.
“Oh you don’t know what hell I’m going through Prue!! You’re dead.” past Phoebe winced hard.
“I see the head!” past Piper laughed.
“Really?” past Phoebe asked; a weak smile creeping across her face.
“I think our niece is coming.” Past Ani said.
“Finally!” past Paige giggled.
“Oh, oh whoa, that really hurts.” past Phoebe screamed. And then, she heard a little cry and a tiny newborn was brought up to her chest.

Phoebe smiled, joyfully. “I remember that. When Sarah was born, even Prue came down to see that.”
Ani nodded, “That was one of the most beautiful things I have ever seen. Sarah is beautiful sweetie. Phoebe, what do you want to see next?” Right now Ani hated her power. Pensiance… It was just bringing her sister back pain. Or maybe she’d get better. She really wanted Phoebe to get better. Ani missed her playful high-spirited older sister. Actually, in truth Ani was more of the older sister, to Paige and Phoebe, so she felt responsible for Phoebe’s actions. She realized what she was doing again and slapped her head; she was being so much like Prue! And she hated that.
“What are you doing?” Phoebe asked.
“Lets just get on with the next memory.”

Past Phoebe and Luke stood with a three-year-old Sarah in their arms. “Daddy! I wanna go on the wheeley.” She pointed to a shiny pink tricycle.
“Ok, why don’t we ask your cousin if she’ll let you.” Luke smiled and put past Sarah down.
Sarah ran up to one of past Ani’s twin daughters and said, “Jas ca I go on the wheeley?”
Jasmine stood there her blond hair back in two pink berets and said, “No! Mine!”
Past Shawn came up to her, “Sweetheart, we bought this so you could share it with your sister and your cousins. You’re three years old, and old enough to share. Ok honey?” Jasmine put on a frown and gave the tricycle to her cousin. Sarah looked satisfied and began riding the small vehicle.

“Bad, Jas huh?” Ani laughed, hugging Phoebe.
Phoebe didn’t smile back, “Yeah, well..”
“Are you ok Pheebs? Do you wanna go back?”
“No!” Phoebe snapped, “I wanna see it.”
“Ok. But… If you want to stop, just say the word.” Ani noticed that in the depths of Phoebe’s dark brown eyes, she had tears.

“I’m so so sorry Phoebe.” Past Darryl was at the door, he patted her shoulder, tears in his eyes.
“For what?” Past Phoebe looked concerned. “Did anything happen to my sisters?”
“No. It’s Luke.”
“Oh my god. What?? What happened to Luke!? Tell me Darryl!!” Past Phoebe had fear plastered all over her face.
“He was in an accident. A horribly bad one. He was taken to the hospital. I’m so sorry. He uh, died when they got him here.” Darryl moved in to hug past Phoebe and she sobbed into his shoulder.
“It c-can’t b-be t-true.”

Phoebe had an angry look on her face, tear’s still making their way down her cheeks.
“Honey, let’s go.” Ani waved her hands as if making the memory stop. It just kept going.
“Can’t you make it stop?” She sobbed.
“I don’t think I can. We’re too far in. Phoebe, it’ll be ok. I don’t even know why I let you relive these horrible moments.” Ani, hugged her sister, and stroked her brown hair. It was Ani herself who had a tragedy similar to this. She remembered when James died, the fireball heaved at his chest, only to be meant for Ani.

Past Piper held a baby Melinda in her arms, leading past Sarah through the door. She soon stopped at what she saw. Past Phoebe was sitting at the table, drinking the last of her gin. “Phoebe! You been drinking?”
“Whaddya shink Pipperrrrrrr?” She slurred. Bitter tear’s burning at her eyes, and her hands clenched the bottle so hard they were bright red. “What the ... do you shink?”
“Oh my god, Phoebe we need to get you some help.” Piper started to dial Darryl’s number and call for Leo, but past Phoebe stopped her, by slapping her in the face. Past Melinda started screaming and past Sarah cried.
“Mommy, why did you huwt aunt Pipe?” Past Sarah stepped out, but past Piper held her in place.
“Honey, why don’t you go upstairs?” Past Piper pushed past Sarah in the upstairs direction.
“Oh no, keep this little bitch right where I can see her.” Past Phoebe smiled cruelly.
“Phoebe! God! She’s your daughter, I know this is because L-U-K-E died but you cannot take it out on us! You really need some help.”
“Luke died? So what. I don’t ...ing care. Oh, another one of Phoebe’s famoush husbands dead. And Phoebe ...ing suffering.” Past Phoebe broke down and cried.

“Make it stop! Please Ani!!” She let her body fall, until she was crouched down, holding her knees. Her light brown hair fell over her shoulders and face. Ani sat next to her, and kissed her on the head.
“Sweetie, everything’s going to be ok. It’s already done. It’s already happened. Sarah loves you, Piper loves you, Mel loves you, and I love you. Don’t worry. Everything is fine.”
Phoebe whipped her hair out of her face, “No. Everything isn’t fine. Luke is dead.”
“I understand how you feel.”
“Maybe you do, but I had to go through this twice. Once with Cole and then with Luke. What is it? Am I cursed? Is anyone allowed to love me?” Phoebe rocked her body, about to say something else, but she was cut off by another memory.

“Where is mommy?” past Sarah asked, getting up and putting down the plastic toy she had been playing with.
“Mommy is not feeling well today so I’m going to take you to school. Kay, banana?” past Paige held her arms out to her niece.
“But, I want mommy. NOW!” Sarah reached the top of her lungs.
Past Paige knew Sarah was on the verge of a tantrum, so she said, “Hey banana, how bout we stop by the candy shop on the way to preschool. We can get you some sweets and maybe bring some home for mom.”
Sarah stopped her yelling and smiled, “I bet mommy would like that.”
“I bet she will too and I bet you like that. Sweets are good huh?” Paige picked Sarah up and started tickling her.
“Befow I go to pwescoo can Auntie Paigey bwush my hair?” Sarah made Paige sit down and she plunked on her lap.
“Auntie Paige loves brushing your hair.” Paige took the pink brush and started brushing Sarah’s light brown hair. She put it up in berets and said, “You look so much like Phoebe, you know that?”
“Who’s Phoebe?”
“I meant you look like your mommy.” Paige laughed.
Sarah smiled, enchanted by the idea, “Mommy is vewy pretty.”
“Exactly, and so are you, noodle.” She hugged Sarah. Present Ani and Phoebe smiled at their sister. They knew that she wanted kids badly, and she was the only one without her own child.
Past Phoebe came in, looking pale and sickly, “Ooh god.” Paige just glared at her.
“Phoebe, you got d-r-u-n-k last night, didn’t you?” Paige whispered, spelling out the words so Sarah wouldn’t know what they were talking about.
“Yeah I guess I did get d-r-u-n-k. Got any of that magic ‘h-a-n-g-o-v-e-r healer’?”
“Not this time sis. I have to take your wonderful daughter to school.” Paige rolled her eyes and marched Sarah right out the door.

Ani summoned all her strength and got Phoebe out of “memory land”. They both found themselves lying on the sofa.
“I really did abandon her didn’t I?” Phoebe asked.
“I can’t say no, but you can change your acts.” Ani, smiled at Phoebe as her two daughters ran up to her.
“Alex, Jas!” She laughed, as her twin daughters came around and hugged her.
“Why were you using you powa?” Alexandria asked.
“No reason.”
Jasmine jumped on Phoebe’s lap. “Auntie Phoebe awe you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine, why do you ask sweetpie?”
“You look sad.” Jasmine kissed Phoebe on the cheek. “Did I heal your booboo?”
“Aw, sweetpie thankyou. You did.” Phoebe smiled at the little girl and stroked her blond hair. Alexandria put her head in Phoebe’s lap, her brown hair hanging over Phoebe’s jeans. They both looked up at her with their big blues.
“I love this family,” Phoebe announced.

“I now know what to do.” The demon was, Stryais, someone who had been studying the Charmed One’s behavior for a while. Stryais looked like a normal human, perhaps because he was a quarter human, and he had humans smarts. The one thing he didn’t have was a humans emotions, he was glad for that. All they ever did was keep you off track. His major powers were fireballs, heat touching, and fire stealing. When he got really angry, his eyes glowed orange.
“What are you going to do?” His minion, a little green demon asked.
“I have been studying the Charmed Ones for weeks now. And I know now that we cannot physically attack. No. We must emotionally attack.” Stryais focused his gaze on a near by torch and stole the fire from it.
“How so my lord?” The small demon asked.
“The naïve one, Phoebe. She’s the key to the whole family’s weakness.” He paused, smiling to himself. “All I have to do is force that alcohol stuff that humans like so much down her throat.”

Phoebe was home alone, looking out the window of her bedroom. She closed her eyes and cried. Sometimes the pain was too much; sometimes she just wanted to die. “Luke. Why did you have to go like this? I never got to say goodbye.” She whispered into the windowpanes, her breath leaving an icy mist on the glass. She imagined his warm hand in hers and his dark thick hair. Her body ached for him. Sometimes she just wanted to join him “up there”, it would be so much easier. But she couldn’t just abandon her responsibilities like she had been doing. Sarah needed a mother, just a mother could be enough, but no mother would forever scar her. And Phoebe loved Sarah, now that Sarah was in her life; it was hard to imagine a life without her. Sarah was her only baby, close to her heart and part of Luke’s heart too. “I just wi... could be easier.” She looked up and heard a crash downstairs.
“Pipe? You home?” She yelled down. Getting no answer she asked, “You okay?” Fearing her sister was hurt, she ran down the stairs, only to find a young man.
“Who are you?” She asked, fear consuming her.
“Uh, the door was open. My name is Sam and I work for a marketing group. I need your opinion on something.”
“I don’t wanna buy anything from you.” She said.
“We jus want your opinion on this new and improved beer. It’s a free sample you know.” He smiled at her, blue eyes twinkling.
She looked at the beer; it’s smell tantalizing her. She could almost taste it, mouth watering she turned away. “No thanks,” She started, “good bye.”
“Oh come on, you know you want it. Free beer. The finest taste in all of California.”
“No, I really don’t.”
“Yes, you really do.” His eyes turned fiery red. Phoebe catching on, tried to kick him, but he took a hold of her and took the beer and shoved it down her throat. She choked, his hand squeezing her neck, he could just kill her right now, but he wanted to see her and her family suffer. He made the beer go down her throat with his powers and laughed, she was going down.

Phoebe was passed out on the floor when Piper got home. “Phoebe honey, wake up! Oh my god, what happened?” Phoebe opened her eyes and took the bottle of beer that Stryais had left. She gulped it down and smiled, satisfied.
“Phoebe! I thought you promised me!”
“Whash I don’t remembish thaaat.” Phoebe staggered around but found her balance and giggled.
“Phoebe, come on… I need to get you to—
“I am perfeshctly finne.” Phoebe yelled.
“Phoebe you’re ...ing drunk! What the hell am I supposed to do? What if you hurt someone?” Piper took a hold of her sister and tried to sit her down.
“LIKE YOU?” Phoebe yelled, pushed her sister down and kicked her while she was still on the ground.
“Phoebe, stop it! This isn’t you. I can’t believe it.”
“Well believe this bish!” She cracked the beer bottle over her sister’s head, Piper instantly blacking out. Leftover beer spilled over Piper’s head. The liquid looked red, it was Piper’s blood. But Phoebe didn’t look back; she punched the glass that held the family’s alcohol stash and grabbed another beer. (The stash had been locked up and hidden away so Phoebe couldn’t get to it.)
“God I wonder why I evesh listened to you.” Phoebe looked down at her unconscious sister.
She kicked the front door open while Paige was coming in with Sarah. The first time Paige saw Phoebe, she realized she was drunk. “Sarah!” She yelled. “Get inside and call for Uncle Leo, ok?” Sarah quickly nodded her head and rushed into the house.
Phoebe ran to Piper’s car and started up. “No!” Paige yelled. She orbed into the passenger’s seat of the car. Phoebe started driving, as Paige grabbed her arm and tried to stop her from going farther. Phoebe punched Paige square in the face and Paige passed out.

Leo paced the foyer floor quickly, while Sarah looked at him. “Uncle Leo, why you walking so much?”
“Oh, honey, I’m just worried.”
“Bout mommy and auntie Paigey?”
The phone rang, saving Leo from having to answer this simple, yet complicated question.
“Hello, is this one of Paige or Phoebe Halliwell’s relatives?” A professional voice asked over the phone.
“Yes,” Leo said gravely. “I’m their brother-in-law, whats wrong?”
“Well, one of them was severely drunk. They were both in a car crash on Jenkins Street.”
“Oh .... This is very bad.” Sarah’s eyes widened at his words.
“Well sir, I recommend you come here as soon as possible. Bay Memorial Hospital.”
“Ok, I’ll be there.” Leo said as he slammed the phone into the cradle. He sensed Ani and orbed her and the kids home.
Leo turned to Piper who he had healed from her ordeal and hugged her. “Phoebe and Paige were in an accident.”
“Oh god.” Piper felt tears rush to her eyes. “Was Phoebe driving?”
Ani rushed over to the two and hugged them. “We need to go to the hospital.” She said, using her telepathic powers.
“Who’s going to baby-sit the kids?” Piper sniffed.
“Baby I will.” Leo whispered, stroking her hair.
“But Leo, I need you there. With me.” Piper whispered.
“Where’s Shawn? Maybe he could baby-sit.”
“Didn’t he have like that really important meeting?”
“Okay, then it’s settled, I’ll stay back. Honey, don’t worry, if you need me, I’m just an orb away.”
Ani and Piper rushed to the car, the ride almost totally silent, until Piper said, “What if something really bad has happened to them?”
“Honey, you can’t think like that.”
“But what if it has? What if the last time I ever saw Phoebe was when I screamed at her, or the last time I ever saw Paige was unconscious.”
Ani closed the tears out of her eyes, like her mother, she wasn’t one for emotions or tears. “Let’s just go to the hospital.”

“The sisters are here.” A nurse told one of the doctors that was dealing with Phoebe and Paige’s condition.
“Alright, I’ll meet them in the waiting room.” He said, as the nurse sauntered off.
Piper and Ani sat on the blue couches in the waiting room, when Ani saw the doctor; she squeezed Piper’s hand and said something comforting.
“Hello. I presume that you are Paige and Phoebe’s sisters.” The doctor adjusted his glasses and shook Piper and Ani’s hands.
“What’s wrong with our sisters, Dr…” Ani trailed off, realizing she didn’t know the doctor’s name.
“Dr. O’Lara.” He smiled sadly at the two. “Your sister Phoebe was drunk-
“Figures.” Ani mumbled under her breath.
“What was that? Has Phoebe been drunk before?” Dr. O’Lara asked.
“Let’s just say it’s been a trend,” Ani nodded.
“Okay, well. I’m sure you’ve all learned in school that drinking and driving leads to disasterous situations.”
“Will you just get the hell to the part about our sisters?” Piper whispered loudly.
“You’ll have to excuse my sister, she’s under a lot of stress.” Ani gave Piper a look.
“That’s normal. No I don’t mind. Anyways, about your sisters…” O’Lara started.
“Yes, about my sisters.”
“I’m sure your other sister Paige tried to stop Phoebe because Paige was blacked out before the car crash. Does your sister by any chance get violent when she’s consumed alcohol?”
“Unfortunately yes.” Ani sighed, “We’ve had problems with that.”
“Fortunately, no one else was hurt in the crash because Phoebe slammed into a large tree.” He frowned, “The car almost flipped over but, luckily it didn’t. It screeched to the trunk and it hit almost all sides of the car.”
“Oh my god.” Ani whispered but Piper just shook her head.
“Right now, they still haven’t returned to consciousness. We’re fairly sure by this point that Paige could slip into a coma. Phoebe might wake up sooner. Paige was on the side that got slammed into the tree, also her door opened and she would’ve been thrown out if she hadn’t been wearing her seatbelt.” Dr. O’Lara looked sad.
“So are you saying Paige could die?” Piper’s voice crackled as she spoke, her nose red, a symbol she was crying.
“I haven’t lost a patient yet and I don’t intend to now.”
Piper buried her head in Ani’s shoulder, “I-I can’t do t-this.” She felt Ani wrap her arms around her. Ani felt tears threatening to come out of her own eyes, burning, she wiped them and held Piper in a tight embrace.
Piper sobbed, “W-what if they d-die?” Piper felt dizzy and let herself fall to the chair. She didn’t care what happened to herself. She had already gone through enough pain to last a lifetime; she didn’t need more.
“Honey, remember what the doctor said, they are probably not going to die.”
“I don’t ...ing care if the doctor says that. Doctors always lie.” She cried some more into Ani’s jacket, leaving a wet spot where her tears landed.
Ani silently apologized to Dr. O’Lara who gave an understanding nod. “If you want,” He said. “You can see Phoebe. Paige is in intensive care, but you can see Phoebe.” In a lower voice he said, “If she’s ready that is.”
Piper shot him a glare and growled, “I need to see her.” It didn’t matter that Piper was furious with Phoebe, she’d think about that later, if Phoebe woke.
The three walked down the hospital aisles, feet clanking on the white floor. A clean septic smell filled Ani’s nose; she ignored it. That septic smell meant many things to her. The smell when they told her James was dead, when she had, had her first taste of her curse. But it also reminded her of the time her friend Kate had recovered from a broken leg, and her favorite; the time her two children had been born.
“Here we are.” Dr. O’Lara pushed open the heavy door and stepped into Phoebe’s small, stuffy room.
The room was a regular hospital room. There were blue curtains covering the windows, shocking white walls, everything in its place. Except Phoebe. Phoebe was in the bed, tubes hooked to her nose. Luckily for her, her chest was moving up and down quietly. Piper and Ani walked to the sides of Phoebe’s bed and stroked her hair. Phoebe’s face was white and her lips chapped. There were purple swelling bruises all over face and some bloody scratches. Both sister’s cringed at the sight of her.
“She broke her leg, so we gave her some painkillers. She woke once and asked for you. She didn’t seem to know what she was saying after that and passed out.” Dr. O’Lara paused, “Do you want some time alone?”
“Uh, yes. That would be great.” Ani spoke up, and smiled weakly, although her insides felt as if they were being torn apart.
“Okay, I’ll be back in a few.”

There was silence for several minutes. To Ani they seemed like hours, she didn’t want to think about this.
“Damn her.” Piper said, her voice shaky. “DAMN her!” She said a bit louder.
“Piper, what are you talking about?” Ani, tried to come near her but Piper shoved away.
“She left this family broken. She didn’t care about the consequences.” Now that Piper knew Phoebe was going to live, she felt the need to yell.
“Honey, I’m sure-sure she did.”
“Uh-huh. After all that, she got drunk AGAIN.” Piper looked down at her sister. “Paige is dying.” Her voice threatened to give out.
“We don’t know that!” Ani tried to stay calm, but Piper was pushing her limits.
“Over and over, Phoebe has done this. Over and over we have forgiven her. We raised her daughter! She even knows the way she’s been acting. Yet she still drinks and THEN drives.” Piper shook her head and let her body fall to a chair. “It was her husband. I know that’s horrible, but she friggin needs to get over him. She needs to understand she’s STILL GOT a family.”
“Piper, I know how you must be feeling and I’m feeling it too. But you know, I’ve gone through this kind of experience before, it is so painful.”
“Yeah, but you didn’t get drunk.” Piper started.
“Oh how would you know? I got drunk, high, tried to kill myself. The works. But you know why I got better?” Ani didn’t wait for Piper to respond. “Because of my friend’s, my foster brothers, SUPPORT. And if you ask me, we’re not giving Phoebe any damn support. There was a time we did, but I guess we’ve just abandoned her.”
“But-
“If you ask me, I don’t think Phoebe was the one that drank the alcohol.”
“How couldn’t she? I mean it is going to be her choice, especially after I saw her drink it out of her OWN free will.” Piper rolled her eyes.
“I just think there’s one part of the story that you’re not seeing.” Ani got up and paced the room until she got to Phoebe’s bed. She sat on her knees by her sister and took one of Phoebe’s hands. The hand was dry and pale; it had one of those machines that measure pulses attached. She took it in hers and gently squeezed it.
“What are you doing to her?” Piper looked at her younger sister curiously.
“I’m trying to see if I can get a memory.”
“I thought Pensiance didn’t work like premonitions. I thought it was just the will of your brain.”
“Piper, it also helps to be closer to the person.” Ani concentrated on Phoebe.
“So are you getting anything?”
“Nada. Something is covering it. Maybe it’s the alcohol. I wouldn’t know.” Ani sighed. “I don’t think she’s going to remember what happened before this whole fiasco either. She consumed enough alcohol to fill a school gym.”
“Maybe she doesn’t want you to see what’s happened.”
“Back to blaming her are we?” Ani teased.
“ ‘We’ are. Especially since it was—
“It’s the way you handle grief best Piper.” Ani whispered.
“What?”
“I’ve seen your memories. Prue, the first time Leo told you he was an elder. Pain is a difficult and complicated feeling. One that none of us wants to experience, so by covering up the pain, you think you can’t feel it.”
“Thanks for the psychological moment.” Piper said, but deep in her mind, she knew Ani was right.

Phoebe was in a state of dreams. Mostly drunken, not so clear dreams. But when she woke up she would know she had them. They were about her sisters screaming, her daughter, dying. She saw every inch of her body covered with red blood, or was it bloody marys? She pictured herself in a blurry state holding her daughter, her daughter squirming to get out of her grasp, running away from her. Phoebe saw him emerge from the fog of her mind, arms outstretched. Sarah was running to him, disappearing in the mist, farther and farther away.
Ani and Piper heard her gasp- rather loudly. They both rushed to her bed, “Pheebs? Pheebs??? You awake?” Piper gently shook her sister so that she wouldn’t hurt her.
Her eyelids moved a little and she murmured something. Ani brushed Phoebe’s hair back from her face, “Phoebe honey, it’s us your sisters.”
“No. Don’t!” She yelled in a loud whisper.
“I don’t think she can hear us.” Piper looked worried.
“We should call the doctor.” They got a doctor into the room, who checked on Phoebe as she murmured more under her breath.
“Is she okay?” Ani asked.
“She’s fine. Sometimes after something like this happen, people often have guilty consciences or bad dreams, reminding them of what they did.” Ani let out a breath she didn’t even realize she had been holding. The doctor, looked at Phoebe. “She’s probably going to wake up in a few minutes. I think she would want you guys to be there when she gets up, huh?”
“Yeah, probably.” Piper said, looking at her pale sister.
The doctor stayed in the room for an awkward eternity, until Phoebe stirred. She moved slightly, the doctor and her sister’s immediately at her side.
Phoebe opened one eye; blinded by the sudden light, she shut it again. “Phoebe honey, come on sweetie wake up.” Ani’s voice was so soothing and comforting that Phoebe instantly felt safe, despite those horrible dreams.
Phoebe opened the other eye slowly. Her eyes were heavy and watery; it was hard to even see because of the horrible blur. Once she moved, she automatically had a blinding headache and felt sick to her stomach. Her lips were really chapped. She fought out the blur and saw her sisters standing by her bed looking worried. So they weren’t dead. Not yet at least. She was fairly sure the dreams she had were premonitions but she couldn’t remember anything that happened before them. She felt as if she had skipped a moment in her life.
“Phoebe? Can you hear us?” Came Ani’s overly concerned voice.
“Ani,” Came her crackled, weak voice.
“Oh Phoebe thank god.” The sisters gave a sigh of relief.
“Bad thing