Disclaimer: I lay no claim to any of the Charmed characters, quotes, or overt references that may appear in my stories. They are the sole property of Spelling Television. I write for my own satisfaction and for the enjoyment of those who choose to read them.
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Prue 12
Piper 9
Phoebe 5
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The Price Of A Broken Promise
Chapter 1
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By breaking a promise to someone, you lose their trust. Trust is easier to win and lose than it is to recover.
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It was a typical Saturday afternoon at the Halliwell Manor. Grams was in the kitchen trying out one of her new recipes, Piper was in the conservatory with her nose buried in a book, Prue was getting ready to go to the park with Andy and... well then there was Phoebe.
She sat on the front steps arms crossed ready to do battle with anyone who dared cross her path. Prue had promised to take her to the park and swing her on the big kids’ swings, that is until she broke that promise so she could go with Andy instead. Prue had been breaking a lot of promises lately, to both her sisters.
It had been less than a year since they lost their mother. Grams, bless her, did her best but unfortunately circumstances placed more responsibility on Prue’s twelve year old shoulders then was fair or healthy. Piper being older and more independent didn’t seem to mind as much but the only thing Phoebe understood was the one who never broke her word as doing it all the time, and it hurt.
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“Grams I’m going now. Andy will bring me back in time for dinner.”
“Ok Dear, have a good time.”
Grams knew of Prue’s broken promise to Phoebe. Everyone on Prescott Street knew when her youngest granddaughter was not happy. But she also knew her oldest granddaughter was given a job that many adults even have trouble handling. Being twelve was hard enough without adding parental supervision to the built in angst of puberty. Prue rarely complained about having to help raise her sisters, but then again, Prue was one rarely to express her inner feelings. No Prue needed to just be a twelve-year-old even if it meant allowing the number one rule in the Manor to be broken.
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“Hey Pipe?”
“Piper!”
“PIPER!”
“WHAT!?!” Piper jumped as the book she was so engrossed in was pulled from her grasp.
“Now that I have your attention. I want to ask you a favor. Would you...”
“I’ll try, but you know it’s YOU she wants to have take her, not me. I never push her high enough.” Piper said not missing a beat as she snatched her book back from Prue’s hand.
It amazed Prue how Piper could always finish her sentences.
“I hate when you do that!”
Just raising her eyes over the top of the pages she said. “I know.” as a bold grin played across her lips.
“Ooh you. Promise me you’ll at least ask?”
“Yeah, yeah I promise.”
“Now all I have to do is get past the front steps.” Prue muttered under her breath.
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She heard the door open, her little heart raced hoping her big sister had changed her mind. But her hopes were dashed when she smelled the new perfume Grams had given Prue for her birthday. Phoebe’s heart still raced but hope was now replaced with anger.
“Hey Squirt!” Hoping her pet name would wipe away some of the hurt she saw behind Phoebe’s tears.
Dramatically moving to the extreme edge of the step she hollered “Weave me awone!” Phoebe spat the words out with such venom the devil himself would have taken pause.
Prue hated to hurt either of her sisters but Phoebe was so expressive that it cut even deeper than with Piper.
“Look Pheebs, I’m sorry! Andy called at the last minute and we haven’t spent hardly anytime together all summer. I promise I’ll make it up to you. How about tomorrow you and I take a picnic lunch to the park, just you and me? What do you say, huh?”
“I say, Pwue’s pwomises don’t mean shi...”
“PHOEBE HALLIWELL!!”
“Don’t you dare say it or I’ll wash your mouth out with soap!”
Knowing that that would be a promise her big sister would keep, Phoebe wisely left it unsaid.
Just as Prue was going to go into a lecture about the proper verbal etiquette for five-year-olds Andy walked up the steps.
“Hey, Junior, why so glum chum?” Andy said taking in the sad look on the youngest Halliwell.
All he received in return was a glare Phoebe was getting to be very good at.
Andy looked up at Prue. “I swear she looks just like you when you’re pis... I mean upset.”
“Yeah that’s the one.” Andy muttered under his breath as he looked into the fuming face of his girlfriend.
Trying to ensure his ‘date’ with Prue didn’t turn into a complete disaster, he asked if she was ready to go.
“Oh Yeah!! I am so ready.” She said through clinched teeth as she tried to reign in her irritation... or was it guilt?
“See ya Pheebs, be good for Grams.”
With that she took the arm Andy had gallantly extended and turned retreating down the uneven stairs of the old Victorian manor.
The now fuming Phoebe, watching her opportunity to go to the park walking away with each step her sister took, chose to show her displeasure without Prue seeing.
She awkwardly stood up taking her tiny hands and dramatically placing them akimbo style on her hips and proceeded to stick her tongue out as far as it would go.
Without missing a beat or even turning around Prue shouted. “You’d better stick that tongue back in your mouth, where it belongs, if you know what’s good for you, Missy.”
Rolling her pooling eyes she plopped back down in defeat. “I never win, Piper can weed minds and Pwue has eyes in the back of her head.”
Andy and Prue had just made it to the bottom walk when Prue noticed the beat up brown van that was parked across the street.
“I never saw that van in the neighborhood before.” Andy said as he followed Prue’s gaze.
“Me either. Maybe the Johnson’s have company.” Prue mused as a distinct feeling of uneasiness settled in her heart.
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Maggie wasn’t always filled with such hate or greed. No, in fact she had started her illegal adoption network in order to help the poor outcasts that reflected what she herself once was. She wanted to give them homes, a luxury that she had never been afforded. But her motives of charity and compassion turned quickly to blind greed and unresolved resentment. She turned from advocate to businesswoman and from champion of the underdog to the enemy of those she came to save.
Maggie first started out helping kids born on the streets. Where the lost, needy and innocent, that were jaded by the insidious lure of prostitution and drugs sought her aid. But she soon found that the upper middle class children were far more lucrative. So she went from being given her young charges to taking them. At first it was difficult to justify her actions, but with each kidnapping her morals weakened as her resolve strengthened.
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The women sat behind the wheel. She had been watching her for weeks but each time she wanted to make her move one of her sisters would thwart her plans. But not this time. She’ll fetch a handsome fee. This time the beautiful brown haired girl will be mine. I know a couple who would just love to be your mommy and daddy.
Maggie withdrew from her reverie and looked at the little girl sitting next to her. She took her on every job. It helped divert the questioning eyes, making it look like she was just enjoying a day out with her daughter. But it was proving to be a risk. The last time they went out she made such a scene that she lost out on a perfect ‘catch’, as she coldly refer to them.
“Tracy, you had better stay in this van!! Don’t you DARE mess this one up or I will make sure you’ll regret it. If I HEAR your voice or SEE your face I will put you back in the closest so fast... I know how you just love the dark.” Maggie paused as the tiny frame shook with fear, she felt a sudden sense of remorse for scaring the poor gentle soul. But the moment was a fleeting one as once again anger and bitterness washed over her calloused conscience. “NOW promise me you won’t be a BAD girl.” The little girl’s eyes got big and her face grew pale. She hated the dark, but worst she hated the beating that always came before being locked in the place where only clothes should be stored. Tracy didn’t answer fast enough and Maggie grew even more agitated. Grabbing the girl by both arms so tightly that bruises were sure to appear, she shouted.
“I SAID PROMISE!!”
“Yes, Ms Maggie, I promise.” Tracy said just above a whisper.
Feeling that she put enough fear in the girl she relaxed her grip. She then looked in the side view mirror, her pursed lips drew into a perfect grin, as she saw Prue and Andy turn the corner... she knew it was time. Without another word she got out of the van and headed toward the Manor steps.
“Phoebe sat there crying. “Why don’t you wike me Pwue? What’s wong wiff me?”
“Hey Phoebe, why are you so sad?”
Phoebe jumped at the unfamiliar voice. She wondered how this stranger knew her name. Maybe she’s a friend of Grams. Still, she knew never to talk to strangers so she just stared or rather glowered.
“It’s ok I understand, you’re not suppose to talk to strangers right? You are being
very smart. But I was just wondering why such a pretty girl would look so sad. Did Prue upset you again?”
“You... you know Pwue?”
“Yeah she’s your big sister right?”
“Wight.” Phoebe was still not comfortable with this unannounced visitor, but as always her curious nature won out.
“Awe you a fwend of Gwams?”
“Uh, yes, yes I am and she called and asked me to take you to the park.” Maggie ad-libbed, surprised at how easy the youngster was falling into her trap.
“NO SHE DOESN’T!! My Gwams told me I hafta stay home today, and she don’t wie.” Phoebe said as her glare once again returned.
Ok maybe not so easy..., Maggie mused, not counting on how feisty her young prey would be. As she paused to think of another approach, she was, moments later, brought back by Phoebe’s second question.
“Is that your widdle girl?”
Turning quickly to see Tracy peeking out the side window of the van, Maggie’s fury, at her disobedience, ignited an idea.
“Uh... yes she’s mine, but you see she has a problem and well... that why I came to see you.”
“You came to see me?”
“Yep, I think... no I know you are the only one who can help her. Please won’t you try.” Maggie inwardly grinned at the quality of her performance, as she saw the little girl’s internal tug of war.
“What’s her pwoblem?”
“I think she’s kind of lonely. You see she doesn’t have any brothers or sisters to play with and she is always sad. Would you mind helping me cheer her up?”
Phoebe glanced once again at silhouette peering out of the mud-splashed glass; and could see the tears glistening on the little girl’s cheeks despite the distance. She looked exactly how Phoebe felt.
“Well... I don’t know. I pwomised my big sister, you know Pwue, that I would never go wiff someone I don’t know, but... she does wook weawy weawy sad.”
“Oh she is!! But I know that YOU could make her smile again.” Unwittingly Maggie’s words hit Phoebe in just the right spot, her heart.
“Ok, but Pwomise me you won’t tell my sisters or Gwams.”
“I promise!” Maggie said as she crossed her heart and held out her hand.
As they started down the steps hand in hand Phoebe began to feel her tummy getting flutterbys, as she called them. She then remembered what her Grams told her about when something didn’t feel right, that that was her body telling her she was in danger and to listen to it. She knew it to be true as she got closer to the van and saw the little girl violently shaking her head NO!!
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The farther away they walked the more pronounced Prue’s nervousness became. She didn’t know why but she knew she had to get back home and FAST!
“Umm look Andy I sorry, but I need to get home right away, I can’t explain it, it’s just I have this funny feeling. Please take me back.”
“It’s the van, I’m feeling it too. I can’t explain it either but... Wait, aren’t the Johnson’s on vacation?”
They both looked at each other in brief realization and then took off running faster than they thought they ever could.
Piper knew she promised her big sister to ask Phoebe about the park, but this book was so good and she had just gotten to a very crucial part in the plot. “Just one more chapter and then I’ll go.” She said aloud, as she eagerly turned the page.
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As they drew closer to the van the little person inside was growing more and more frantic. She knew what would happen if Ms. Maggie got her in the van, she’d never see her family again. She’d be given a new family or like her, she’d never get picked and have to stay with the others in that hellhole called a house. She had to risk it; she couldn’t... wouldn’t let anymore kids be taken, not if she could help it.
Tracy violently slid opened the rust eaten van door and screamed at the top of her lungs.
“RUNNNNNNNNN!!!”
“RUN LITTLE GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!”
“GET AWAY FROM HER!!!!!”
As Prue and Andy rounded the corner their worst fears were coming true. They saw the stranger grab a now kicking and screaming Phoebe and head in the direction of the vehicle that had caused their suspicions.
“LEAVE HER ALONE!!!!!!!!!!!”
“LET HER GOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”
“PHOEEEEEEEBBBBBBEEEEEEE!!!!”
Hearing her Protector’s voice, she looked up still feverishly trying to get free from her abductor Phoebe let out an anguished cry.
“PWWWWWWWWWWWWWWUUUUUEEEEEEE!!!!
“PWWWEEASSSSE!!!!!”
Piper heard the panic in both her sisters and rushed toward the front door, fear carrying her every step.
“GRRRAMMMMMSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“HURRRRRRRRRRRYYYYY!!!!!”
But her grandmother was already half way down the front steps. Then together they saw the nightmare play out in front of her very eyes.
Maggie had now made it to the side of the van, but the screaming children had caused many neighbors to come running out of their homes on the ready to aid the little girl that had stolen all their hearts. But Maggie was prepared; she pulled out the gun and placed the end of the barrel to Phoebe’s temple. This brought everybody to a screeching halt.
“ANYONE TAKES ONE MORE STEP AND I SWEAR I WON’T HESITATE TO USE IT!!!”
Phoebe had never been so scared or so pissed. So without really knowing how much danger she was in, she turned quickly and with as much force as could muster head butted her kidnaper right in the forehead. This caused a suddenly stunned Maggie to loose her balance and drop the gun, but it also caused the daring Phoebe to knocked herself out. Quickly recovering from the unexpected attack of the spirited five year old, she threw the now still Phoebe into the van, slammed the door, picked up the gun pointing it in threat to any one who would attempt a rescue, and then sped away.
“NNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!”
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Tear a star from out the sky and the sky feels blue.
Tear a petal from a rose and the rose weeps too. ~ Henry Nemo
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The scene could have come out of any police drama.
Flashing blue and red lights atop the cars that read SFPD on their sides.
Some people huddled in small groups talking all at once, making wild gestures. While others spoke in hushed tones as they shook their heads in disbelief.
News stations setting up equipment while eager young reporters readied, to be the first, to get the scoop on the latest breaking story.
Yes, this could have been a scene from a TV show, but it wasn’t.
No actors... just victims.
No script... just improvisation.
No editing... just reality.
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Penny Halliwell stared straight ahead not feeling the comforting arm Mrs. Henderson had wrapped around her shoulder or her words of consolation. No her mind was not registering anything except for the overpowering guilt that was taking possession of her soul.
I am suppose to protect them, you left them in my care and look what happened. If only, I hadn’t allowed Prue to break her promise Phoebe would be safe. If only... Patty I am so, so sorry, please forgive me.
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Piper Halliwell was crushed into her grandmother’s side so closely you would have thought them one. She too was miles away, trying to rewrite history in her mind. Wishing an irritated Prue would shake her out of her daydreaming. But Prue didn’t and she knew her baby sister was really gone and that it was her fault.
I am suppose to be her big sister. Mommy asked me to protect her when Prue couldn’t. I was suppose to keep danger away, not just let it walk up and take her in front of her own home. If only I had gone sooner and tried to take her to the park then she would be here right now taking in all the excitement as if it were a party. If only... I am sorry Mommy I didn’t do what you asked.
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Prue Halliwell was still standing where her feet stopped when she heard her baby sister scream for her help. Help that she didn’t give. Prue was very much lost in the moment as she slowly made her way to where Phoebe was last seen. She gingerly bent down and picked up the lone little shoe. The one that fell off of the tiny foot that had put up such a valiant effort to escape. It was a shoe that held the tiny appendage that would kick her in the middle of the night, run to her when she was happy and stomp away when she wasn’t. Waves of self-blame crashed into the shore of her conscious as guilt flooded her very being.
This is all my fault. If only I had kept my promise, I would have what I don’t deserve... My baby girl. If only.... I failed you Mom. I failed....
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“WHAT AM I GOING TO DO?? I HAVE TO THINK!!”
“THINK MAGGIE, THINK DAMN IT !!!”
Maggie knew she had gone too far this time. Things had gotten way out of hand. Her emotions were clouding her reason; she could barely drive, let alone concentrate on a plan that would fix the mess she found herself in. “I just need to get away long enough to think. I’ve been in hard places before and affected the outcome. THIS will be no different.” She said this as if trying to convince herself rather than stating it with any confidence. So absorbed in her thoughts she didn’t realize that she had allowed the van to veer off course. The next thing she knew the van was heading towards the steep embankment. The lack of controlled speed caused the front wheels to bulk at the unexpected weight it was surprised with; it reacted by flipping the hunk of metal numerous times before allowing it to land in an ominous heap.
Three occupants...
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One unconscious
One injured
One dead
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“The only courage that matters is the kind that gets you from one minute to the next.” ~ Mignon Mclaughlin
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As his police instincts took over, Inspector Trudeau began giving several officers instructions before making his way over to the Elder Halliwell. He was grateful for the rudimentary delay as the uneasy and grim task of questioning and asking for a recent photograph was next on the agenda. As he was giving the last of if his orders, his son came over trying impatiently to get his attention.
“Andrew, I’m very busy right now. It will have to wait until later!” His father said in a tone that implied he was dismissed.
But Andy would not be dissuaded. “DAD!! It’s VERY important. It’s about Phoebe!!”
The last few words grabbed his father’s attention. “What is it son?”
“I got the license plate number.” Andy panted out showing his father the scribbled letters and digits on the inside of his hand.
Ruffling his son’s hair he said “Excellent work Andrew!! I swear you are going to give your old man a run for his money aren’t you?” showing apparent pride at his son’s level headedness.
“Officer Hanson, my boy got the plate number, get it from him and put it over the radio ASAP!!”
“Yes Sir.”
“Now comes the hard part.” Inspector Trudeau said as he headed over to his distraught neighbor and friend.
“Penny I need to ask you some questions.” He said as he gently led her toward the Manor entrance. This had hit way too close to home, literally. The Halliwell’s were as close to family as it got. He vowed to do everything in his power to ensure this ended happily.
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Piper was no longer anchored to the safety of her grandmother so she quickly sought out the refuge of her oldest sister’s arms.
“Prue!!!”
She enveloped her middle sister endeavoring to offer her reassurance. “Shh Piper it will be ok. Andy got the plate number; Mr. Trudeau will find her before you know it and we will be all together again.” Prue said not feeling the encouragement her words were attempting to convey.
“She won’t know what’s happening. She’ll be scared Prue, she’ll want her teddy bear. She’ll want us, but we won’t be there and she won’t know why!!”
“I know Piper, I know.” Prue answered as she could feel the blame radiating around each of her sister’s words.
Piper blames me, hell even I blame me. How could I have been so stubborn? She’s just a kid; a missed trip to the park is huge for a five-year-old. Why couldn’t I have just been the big sister instead of being so thoughtless? One little act of selfishness and I cause my family to lose it’s Light, it’s sense of Joy, it’s last remaining Hope that not all of life stinks. That’s what her beaming face brought, an understanding that life would go on and that she would make the journey worth the while.
Piper could feel her sister tense in her arms.
She thinks it’s my fault. I know she does. I can’t blame her really, she asked me to do one little favor, and what do I do? I put it off. No to be honest I had no intention of talking to Phoebe. I was tired of trying to heal her broken heart, a heart that Prue was breaking all too often. If I could only have that chance again.
“I AM SO SORRY PRUE!!”
“I AM SO SORRY PIPER!!”
They both startled each other at their mutual confessions.
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Jack Trudeau led the catatonic Penny Halliwell to the sofa and eased her into a sitting position. He stared at the mature yet, vibrant woman and swore she was aging right before his eyes. Swallowing hard he dove right into the questioning, but received no response to his queries. Gently placing a hand on her shoulder he reined in the cop and took on the stance of friend.
“Penny, I am sorry to have to be so unfeeling, but the first twenty-four hours are critical. The faster I can get the needed information and her picture out there the better the chance we have.”
But the words were still not registering, as all she could hear was her youngest granddaughter’s screams and all her mind would allow her to see was the look of terror in her big brown eyes.
“Damn it Penny pull yourself together we DON’T have much time.” Jack hated to be so forceful, knowing of her degenerating heart condition; but it was starting to set in, something he saw many times in his career, shock. If he didn’t bring her back from the edge the trauma would land her in the hospital again. Just at he was to attempt again, he heard the firm yet pleading voice of the oldest Halliwell sister.
“Grams, please... Phoebe needs you... we need you. PLEASE help Mr. Trudeau bring our baby sister back.”
Piper was soon at her grandmother’s side and joining in on pulling her back to physical and emotional safety. Taking her hand in hers she said.
“Yeah Grams remember what you told me when I had to make my first speech in front of the whole school assembly?...”
Prue looked at her questioningly, her brow creased in confusion. “How is thinking of the entire audience in their underwear going to help here, Pipe?”
Piper turned and pulled a face and said. “Not that one.”
The innocent irritation between the two sisters caused Jack Trudeau to cover the wide spreading grin beginning to appear on his face.
You remember don’t you Grams. The one where you
said ‘Courage is not the lack of fear...’
“... It is acting in spite of it.” The urgency and love of her remaining charges quickly drew Penny back along with her ferocious fighting spirit. “Thank you girls. Thank you.” She then spontaneously gathered them both to her for a much needed hug.
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Phoebe didn’t know if it was the erratic movement she felt underneath her body, the deafening pounding in her head, the soothing hand that gently ran through her silky hair or a combination of all three, that brought her back to consciousness. Slowly she attempted to open her eyes; half expecting to see one of her sisters mothering yet another of her self inflicted wounds brought on by her fearless nature. Or maybe it would be her Grams sweetly crooning her out of one of her numerous nightmares. But as her focus returned and her eyes adjusted to the van’s dim interior she stared into the big brown eyes of yet another stranger. But this face didn’t scare her, as the young girl’s smile reached deep into soul and told her that her pint-sized look alike could be trusted. As Phoebe attempted to return the smile with a generous one of her own her lips pulled into a grimace and she grabbed at her hammering head, but the pain was only increased by her hurried and spontaneous motion.
“Easy little girl easy. That’s quite a nasty bump on that hard head of yours. Just stay still, we’ll be there real soon.” Tracy hoped that her combination of care and vagueness would bring comfort to the tiny girl lying next to her.
Phoebe obeyed, as her body just wouldn’t cooperate. “Where am I?”
“Ms. Maggie is taking you to her place to meet your new family.” Again the dirty-faced angel endeavored to be evasive without causing panic.
Phoebe still coming out of her fog missed the haunting implication. “Oh... What’s your name?”
“Tracy... What’s yours?” She questioned, relieved that the newest ‘catch’ hadn’t caught on.
“Twacy. I wike it, it’s vewy, vewy pretty. And my name is Umm... Uh... my name is...”
Phoebe’s furrowed brow and waning color told Tracy that that whack her fellow passenger sustained on her forehead must have made her forget.
“I... I DON’T KNOW... I CAN’T WEMEMBER.... WHAT’S MY NAME????” Her frightened voice and pleading eyes made Tracy’s tear in sympathy.
“Shh... It’s ok. You’ll remember when your ready.” Tracy cooed as she tried to calm the rising fear in her new friend. “Hush now. No worries Little One. I’ll take care of you. I promise.”
Phoebe dared to open her eyes from the fear that snapped them shut. As she did she looked in the face of her new friend and asked.
“Pwomise?”
“Promise!”
Phoebe’s racing heart eased into its normal rhythm and her trembling began to dissipate as Tracy tenderly drew her into her own five year old arms.
The last three years of the young girl’s life had been hard and cruel; but she refused to let her unfair circumstances break her spirit. And by doing so she was rewarded with wisdom beyond her years.
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“Ok.” Inspector Trudeau said. “Let me see if I have everything and make sure that it’s accurate.”
Name: Phoebe Marie Halliwell
Age: Five years
DOB: December 19, 1972
Hair: Shoulder length... brown.
Height: 41”
Weight: 35 lbs.
Blood Type: B
Distinguishing marks or features: Small birthmark on outside of upper right arm.
Last seen wearing: A white short sleeved tee shirt with pink flowers and pink shorts cuffed with white trim. Also wearing a gold heart shaped locket with the initials P.M.H. engraved on the back.
“Is that right?” Jack asked as he raised his head from the standard issue, missing persons pro forma.
All three just nodded as the emotions of the day constricted in their throats impeding them from verbally responding.
“Ok then all I need is a picture and I’ll get this on the wire straight away.”
Prue found her voice first as she said. I just developed a roll that was shot just last week. I took one of Phoebe, I’ll go and get it.
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Prue stood in her room staring at the photo that held the face of the one who she may never see again. She swallowed her tears as she recalled the day the picture was taken.
Phoebe had been investigating in the backyard when she discovered what must have been a stray kitten. She sat on top of the picnic table with the small mass of fur she gingerly cupped in her one hand while the other tenderly stroked its gold and white stripes. That’s how Prue found her. She stood just far enough away as to not be seen but close enough to hear the one sided conversation her baby sister was having with the lost feline.
“Don’t be afwaid widdle kitty. I won’t hurt you. Are you losted or did you wunned away?”
“I wanned away once, but my big sister Pwue found me and brung me back home again.
“I was ascared she’d be weally angwy wiff me, but she just hugged me tight and said to pwomise never to weave her again. I pwomised. I even cwossed my heart.”
“Do you half a big sister that will find you? I hope so. I have two of the bestest sisters in the whole wide world, but ya wanna know somefin? When I get all growed up I wanna be just wike my biggest sister Pwue....
Prue with tears in her eyes ran and grabbed her camera. When she returned a grown version of the little kitten cautiously entered the yard. Upon spotting her lost sibling ran and jumped into Phoebe’s lap, licking the little one. Prue could have sworen the older cat had tears in its eyes.
“See I told you, your big sis would come find you.”
Phoebe spoke in a tone of such authority and wisdom that Prue had to smile. Just as Phoebe awkwardly placed them both on the ground she looked up and gave her the biggest smile that’s when she let the shutter snap.
“Oh Pheebs honey, promise me you’ll never grow up to be like me. Find another role model I just don’t measure up. I failed you. And I will never forgive myself and I will never forget.” She abruptly ended her soliloquy with a quick wipe at her tears and then turned and headed back downstairs.
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Just as the Phoebe was beginning to relax the van’s motion rapidly became unpredictable. Each action causing an equal and opposite reaction as even gravity lost its balance. The few loose items in the plummeting rattletrap took flight including two very frightened little girls.
Phoebe locked eyes with her fellow victim, but something caught her attention from her marginal vision and she once again acted on instinct. Mindless of her own pain she grabbed Tracy covering her body with her own, just in time to block the tire iron’s hapless target.
As the van continued to tumble the centrifugal force pulled the intertwined children apart, each to face their fate alone.
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I said to Life, I would hear Death speak. And Life raised her voice a little higher and said, You hear him now. ~ Kahlil Gibran
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Twinkle, twinkle Little Star
How I wonder where you are...
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She rested her weary head against the bed’s wrought iron headboard and allowed the room’s comforting darkness to envelop her aching soul. It was the only portion of her body where any feeling had chosen to remain. She purposely left the casement open in hopes the heavens would produce a possible star; but as she let her bleary gaze wander all her vision was rewarded with was more darkness, even the moon dared not to show itself this night. Yet in Penny’s heart she knew that the sun wouldn’t cower from its ageless duty and would soon flood the room with the brilliance of another day.
It was times like these that she missed her daughter the most. Times when she sought the conversation and wisdom of another adult. A moment when she could let her guard down and briefly escape the overwhelming responsibility of having to carry the burden of grief all alone. Yet the part of her that still wished to protect her child was eternally grateful that Patty was not here having to witness the horrid events that would knowingly rip her daughter’s heart to its very core. As Penny let her mind wander a steamy southern wind floated from the open window, evenly blowing through the veil of blackness, sending languid waves of humidity into the room, a muggy breeze which offered little relief from the blistering heat of the hot August night. But as the haze of heaviness brushed it’s invisible fingers across her drawn face, pulling her from her internal sorrow, Penny eerily felt a deep and icy chill rise within her, replacing her sorrow with an ominous and morbid fear. Instinctively she felt for the two little bodies that she had insisted sleep with her.
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Prue felt the cold clammy hand of her grandmother as she lightly skimmed her forehead, brushing back a stray wisp of tousled hair, just before she repeated the same on a very restless Piper. Normally her loving Guardian’s touch would have given her comfort, but it didn’t and that left her feeling even more withdrawn. Prue reacted to her emotions by tightening her protective grip on the hold she had around her sleeping yet uneasy sister... the only sister she had left.
Prue’s stomach muscles retracted at the emotional blows her guilty conscience was waylaying her with. Her psychological Smackdown, with her number one adversary, virtually left her down for the count.
Guilt threw the first punch sending her fragile psyche sailing into the taut ropes of Regret. The arena’s supports mercilessly recoiled her straight into a painful headlock with Blame. Resignation acted as referee, pulling the two combatants apart and victoriously raising the arm of the winner and undefeated champion. But what scared Prue the most was that the reason for this bloody emotional battle was in part brought on by Her broken promise.
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Piper laid there tossing and turning as her mind heartlessly kept hitting replay. Each time the anguished tragedy repeated itself she attempted to edit it’s reality, but the outcome was always the same. Her efforts to cut, splice, and rewrite were fruitless as the video of memory would forever remain an uncut version. She felt the hand of her Grams soon followed by the reassuring arm of her sister. Piper reacted to her emotions by unconsciously nuzzling closer to her awake, yet troubled sister... the only sister she had left.
Piper’s internally flinched as she watched the credits roll up the picture screen of her mind’s theater. The director was Evil , the lead actor was Loss, the understudy was Worry and the key grip was Fear. But what scared Piper most was that this life unscripted was in part produced by Her broken promise.
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The rear bumper and one of the fenders successfully ejected themselves from the deathtrap just before it landed in its final resting place. It would have traveled on had the mighty oak in its path not prevented it from doing so. The tread bare radials had now come to their last rotation and the van’s undercarriage laid exposed for all to see. The sudden impact caused the sliding van door to draw back its veil and reveal that the worst of the damage lie within the van’s interior.
The unconscious driver hung suspended in the air, her seatbelt the only thing keeping gravity from sending her into a freefall. Shards of broken glass provided a pathway to the next victim. The tiny frame lay with her blank eyes wide open, but the window to her soul reflected overwhelming pain. The third and final casualty could be easily located; as the sun’s rays hauntingly glistened upon the pristine surface of red, which swiftly flowed from the pool of blood surrounding her head. The tire iron lay just to her left proving to be the spirited child’s demise.
The feathery green fern that entered through the now missing window, gently teased Maggie back into consciousness. Disoriented by her topsy turvy condition it took her awhile to gain her bearings. Once she found her center she disengaged the protective harness and headed to the van’s rear to access the situation that just kept getting worse.
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The whole community banded together as an army of volunteers combed the surroundings, the television stations ran the precious photo at every news hour, the local papers made the kidnapping the front page’s lead story. The police chief ordered every available officer onto the case and in an act of great rarity even approved unlimited overtime. But all the long hours and hard efforts resulted in nothing more than false leads, possible sightings, high expectations and dashed hopes. The only concrete information they had was that the van was last registered to a Mary Margaret McCallister, AKA: Maggie Smith. Street Name: Proud Mary. Booked on prostitution in 1970 and was well known on the strip as the Poor man’s baby broker. But a current address on the owner was still at large and so was Mary Margaret McCallister.
~:~:~:~:~ SIX MONTHS LATER ~:~:~:~:~
Unfortunately time marches on and so with it life. The flyers that hung in storefront windows were now sun faded and ignored. The number of tireless and faithful volunteers dwindled, as they needed to return to their own families. The newspapers gradually moved on to more pressing stories as the months provided no new leads. Even the local news stations had slowly weaned the tragic tale out of their daily broadcasts. As the days turned into weeks and the weeks morphed into months all seemed to give up hope of ever finding Phoebe Halliwell, including her family.
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Kevin and Kyle stealthily descended the steepened incline, their every sense on high alert. As they paused to scope out the rugged and wildering terrain, surveying the land for the enemy, their pan to the northwest brought their destination within sight. Both met the other’s gaze and smiled a sly and mischievous grin; before proceeding toward the dense acreage that held the object of their mission.
As they neared the forest’s edge Kevin motioned for Kyle to head north while he bravely continued his quest to the south. Kyle wiped his nervous brow and complied with his elder’s orders. Both of them were very familiar with this timbered region as their weekend assignments usually returned them to this natural and wooded menagerie. As each distanced themselves from the other they carefully reached for their weapons, its firmness within their grasp was always reassuring as the tension of the hunt mounted with each step.
About fifteen minutes into his trek Kevin spotted what appeared to be the brown object they were looking for. The tiny silhouette’s movement confirmed his accuracy. He then slowly and cautiously approached his victim, the foliage silent under his masterful gait. When he felt he was within firing range Kevin purposefully lifted his weapon and focused on his intended target, the smile of a Cheshire never leaving his lips.
Just as he was about to release the deadly projectile a loud voice broke his diligent concentration and sent the catapulted ammunition off course. Kevin watched as the rough cut stone landed with a thud just to the left of the unsuspecting rabbit. The startled woodland creature scampered away grateful that the young boy’s aim was worse than his intentions. Kevin’s “R” rated thoughts were interrupted by the same person who had just foiled his almost certain victory.
“Hey Kev, you gotta see this, come and check it out...”
“Damn it Kyle, I nearly had him this time!” Kevin said as he angrily shoved the slingshot into his back pocket and trotted off in the direction of his baby brother’s voice, plotting with each step how he would even the score.
As he entered the clearing he saw what had drawn his sibling to dare break the first rule of hunting. Picking up his pace he easily sprinted to Kyle’s side. All his painful paybacks were forgotten as they both stared at the upturned metallic heap. Kevin, being the oldest, immediately took the lead; and this time Kyle voiced no objection at having to always be the one bringing up the rear. As they crossed the small expanse their hearts raced in anxious anticipation as to what might lie within the carnage of the demolished old van.
The vile stench that grew with intensity as they guardedly advanced, forewarned them to retreat. The ominous scent of death hung so thickly in the air that both boys lost their morning bowl of Cheerios, but still they pressed on. With courage of adults they wrapped their hands around their nose and mouth and bravely leaned into the opened side door. The brilliant sun flowing through the gaping portals illuminated the van’s interior to a sight that even as old men they would never forget.
The desk was thoroughly covered in papers. Eyewitness statements, task force briefings, crime scene photographs and one framed picture of the little person whose name appeared on every document. It was at that picture that his partner found him staring.
“Hey Trudeau.”
“Trudeau!”
“JACK!!”
“I heard you the first time Monahan you don’t have to shout.” He answered in a voiced deepened by worry and hoarsened from exhaustion.
For the past six months all Jack Trudeau did was eat, sleep and breathe this case. He was bound and determined to return the child, that he regarded like one of his own, back to the waiting arms of her family. Since Victor Halliwell left his family high and dry well over three years ago, he attempted to act as a surrogate father to the paternally abandoned trio. Phoebe being so young when her daddy left, was the one to most easily adapt and she adored him as he did her. Then tragedy struck again when about a year ago their loving mother died in a mysterious drowning. How much could one family endure and still remain sane? His focus was undaunted as compassion drove him to end the string of misfortune in the lives of his friends.
“Pull yourself together Jack, the Chief wants to see you in his office... NOW!” Monahan said as he gave his friends shoulder a reassuring pat.
“Uh thanks Joe...” Jack replied as he stood and headed towards the closed door of his boss’s office. He was confused at his partner’s uncharacteristic actions and the sad reflection in the sea of eyes that followed him to Chief Hanson’s threshold.
He tapped nervously on the frosted glass door pane, before entering, his tension heightened by the eerie rattle that sounded from his whitening knuckles. Jack’s stomach did a 180 as he was greeted by not only the Chief of Police but by the M.E. and the bureau’s forensic Entomologist.
All three gentleman stood as Jack headed to the only empty seat left in the overcrowded excuse for an office.
He extended his sweating hand to the unexpected visitors as he spoke directly to his sympathetic boss.
“Uh, Joe said you wanted to see me, Chief?”
“That’s right I... we do. You remember Tom and Frank...” The supervisor voiced as he motioned to the two now seated men.
Once again Jack acknowledged their presence with a brief nod as his mind was finding it hard to communicate with words.
“Have a seat Trudeau, we have an update on that case you’ve been working on.”
After what seemed to be an eternity in the cramped quarters, Jack felt he was going to suffocate. Not from the lack of oxygen, but from the news that proved to be the hardest of his career. The medical examiner’s autopsy results corroborated with the Entomologist’s findings, substantiating the identification of the body to be that of Phoebe Halliwell.
The agitated pacing of the seasoned inspector only added to the mounting tension in the room.
“Are you sure? I mean what... what about fingerprints? Did they match...”
“Jack you know as well as I do that after six months fingerprints are virtually impossible to obtain... At least as of yet they are working towards a...” But the overzealous doctor was cut off by yet another valid inquiry.
“And what is this about mosquito's? How does that prove anything?”
“Uh... that would be blow flies Inspector and based on their stage of development and that of their larvae, as well as, the climatic conditions we believe we can determine the approximate time of death of said subject...” The nervous man flinched at the raised voice of the infuriated detective.
“Shut up!!! All of you just shut the hell up... How dare you... How dare you condense that poor child and the grief of her family to statistical ratios and callous and yet to be proven theories. Damn it she was... is NOT a Said Subject, she is Phoebe Marie Halliwell a soul... a face... a human being!!! DON’T YOU DARE REDUCE HER TO ANYTHING LESS!!” Jack violently finished as he ran his trembling hands through his hair and resumed his pacing.
“Jack please calm down. These men are not here to be judged they came because they care. Look at the facts. The body was found in the van, whose plate number matched the one your son wrote down at the scene. There was not one eyewitness account that mentioned anyone else in the van other than the abductor and Miss Halliwell. And the statistics and theories overlay perfectly to the time of the incident and the injuries sustained in such a crash. But if that still doesn’t convince you, then believe what you see.” Hanson then gently pushed a plastic bag marked “EVIDENCE” across his desk.
Jack warily lifted the bag and inspected its contents. The objects inside confirmed what he was desperately wanting to deny. The emotional melee was physically exhausting as he slumped his tired frame into the rickety old chair.
The room was deadly quite as the only sound that could be heard was the annoying tick of the wall clock that always ran ten minutes fast. After what seemed like the appropriate amount of time the Chief cleared his throat and dismissed the two doctors, who were more than eager to oblige.
“Look Jack I know this one hit close to the heart. I’ll have Monahan notify the next of kin...”
“No! Ed, please. I’ve got to be the one to break it to them... I owe them that much.”
“Sure Jack I understand.”
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The sound of the doorbell caused all three Halliwell women to emerge from their self imposed exile. Harsh words brought on by exposed nerves, exaggerated anger born from frustration and sadness, and teary apologies that came as reality scolded their negative and destructive behavior; only to have the vicious cycle come full circle the next day. So as the months trudged on, each systematically withdrew, spending their free time in neutral corners, further isolating themselves from all they had left... each other.
As Penny headed to the front door Prue and Piper had arrived on the staircase’s second landing. The frequent and persistent chimes sent a sharp edge into the air already thickened with tension.
“Alright already!” An irritated voice came from a frazzled Penny, who pulled open the door to reveal who their impatient guests were.
The two people who stood flanked by the floor to ceiling stained glass brought a sigh of relief, echoed in the background by an introverted Prue and a clingy Piper. But the ease was to be short lived as they saw the glistening tears in the eyes of both Jack and Helen Trudeau.
Jack asked his wife, who was a nurse; to assist him with the children as he broke the news that no one wanted to hear. Prue and Piper now joined their grandmother, all three wishing the world would open up and swallow them whole. They knew by the tormented look on the wan faces that this was not a social call.
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“Well Jack there must just be some kind of mistake, I mean this new and so ill tested forensic mumbo jumbo is all just a well formulated plan to waste the tax payers dollar now isn’t it?” The reality she was trying to disprove was only becoming more arduous to refute as each attack was countered by a reasonable and well founded explanation.
“Penny calm yourself... Your heart remember?” Helen attempted but knew all too well by the fire in her eyes that Penny wasn’t about to give up.
Prue and Piper sat in the armchair adhering to each other like Velcro. They knew their grandmother’s rant could only mean one thing; she was valiantly attempting to defy what was, to all, looking and feeling like a bad case of deja vu. The same haunting gloom hung in the air, the taut sense of loss balanced precariously between truth and fiction only to be knocked off center by the icy winds of destiny. In one swift moment all doubts would be forever erased as Jack Trudeau slid the evidence bag across the table and silently met the eyes of the woman he revered like a mother.
Penny’s hands trembled with much intensity as she pulled back the opening and removed the contents that would confirm her greatest fear. She unashamedly let the river of tears flow down her cheeks as she pulled the size four short set from the bag. A white short sleeved tee shirt with pink flowers and pink shorts cuffed with white trim. It looked just like she remembered except for one minor detail, the huge blood splatters that were soaked into the outfit’s fabric. As she laid the garment aside a small envelope fell from within its fold. Knowing there was no going back, she raised the seal and removed a small gold chain bearing a heart shaped locket with the initials P.M.H. The unsettled atmosphere and fearful curiosity drew Prue and Piper to move in closer to see what the strange bag contained. As Penny retrieved the clothing and Piper saw the blood; her wish was about to come true as she began to feel the world crumble beneath her feet and successfully attempt to consume her. The next thing Prue saw was her sister fall to the ground and Helen rush to her side, but Prue refused to give into the quake that shook her to her very soul and continued to watch her Grams as she pulled the gold chain from the manila packet. The heart slid to the end of the precious metal and fell to the ground, sending a haunting and tinny echo off the walls that would never echo with her laughter again. The next sound was her grandmother’s anguished cry, burying her face in her hands as she fell to her knees clutching the chain whose heart was gone forever.
“NNNNNNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Jack then knelt down next to the bereaved woman and wrapped his arms around the shoulders that shook with heartbreaking veracity. Prue stood only straighter, locking her knees, forbidding them to give under the weight of yet another loss.
There she stood all alone, just like the last time. No comforting arms or gentle words to ease the ache that was so deep. No answers to the questions her young mind begged for... not even the chance to say goodbye.
Alone.
All alone.
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Up above the world so high
Like a diamond in the sky...
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The loss of a child is...unnatural. It is a death “out of turn” one that upsets the expected orderliness of the universe.
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DEATH... The final frontier. A journey we all must take. Rich, Poor... Young, Old... Man, Woman or Child... None can escape its inevitable clutch. The Wealthy can’t buy eternity and the Destitute can not plead for an extended stay. Youth holds no advantage and Years just prolong its arrival. Gender bears no status when it comes to immortality. All must die. At a place and time of Another’s choosing. It is a fact of life none of us want to admit, but few can refute with any sense of validity.
DEATH... Is no respecter of persons. It is as much a part of LIFE as life itself. But however factual this dogma may be, it is one that is rarely accepted as part of the human rationale. It is discounted as passe or antiquitous thinking, or at the very least it is a subject labeled as taboo in nature. So sadly when the predestined happens all are taken off guard. The earth is spun off its axis, spiraling, helplessly out of control. The stars fall from heaven, raining down celestial pellets of anguish scorching all in their path. The blue of the eastern sky, which once offered the world life, is now westering into the black horizon ~ Never to return. The blinders are mysteriously lifted and the victims now see what was foretold. The unsuspecting masses frantically attempt to scramble, grasp or cling to the closest thing that resembles normal, but find themselves only holding onto fading memories.
DEATH... Is unfair. A wrong that can never be righted. Sadly, nowhere is that more blatantly proven then in the sudden loss of a child. The shock and awe leave those souls left behind savagely in ruins. And so it is in the ruins of three ravaged hearts that we begin the final chapter in the life of Phoebe Halliwell.
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And you learn and you learn
With every goodbye you learn. ~ Veronica Shopstall.
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Penny stood in her room and held the black dress to herself and gazed into the mirror’s reflection. Thorns of sadness pierced her soul, as she never imagined having to where the hideous mourning garb again, so soon. Two beloved husbands, a cherished daughter and now her precious baby girl.
“The goodbyes only keep getting harder. They say that it is in the deepest of sorrows that we learn our greatest of lessons... Well that maybe so, but I fail to see the life altering lesson or the intrinsic value in such philosophical bullshit at the moment. Right now every fiber of my being is in agonizing pain, so to hell with the moral significance. IT CAN’T BRING THEM BACK!!!”
Her anger only drove the bitter thorns in deeper, as drops of tears fell from the one whose Rose had died. It was always in the darkest of moments that she could feel the soft petals of Phoebe’s fingers wipe away her grief; as her smile was the balm that soothed her pain. But not today... today she was going to forever bury her Rose. Slowly she turned and prepared to say yet another goodbye.
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I sit at my window and watch the rain dance
My cheek touching the cool pane of the glass
I tremble as the tears well in my eyes
My heart feels empty and dark as the sky.
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Piper watched as the morning’s rain appropriately reflected how she felt inside. She felt the darkness of death and the emptiness of the room she shared with her best friend. The sky’s dull pallet mirrored the lack of color her world would forever hold. Phoebe’s genuine enthusiasm and zest for life filled the Manor with vibrant hues of blue. Her all consuming passion and endless delight in the simple streaked the azure background with pulsating rays of fuchsia. And her gentle compassion and endless love completed the family’s rainbow with a gentle yet enduring blush of magenta.
“I guess that’s why Mommy always called her Sunshine. She could color your world and brighten the grayest of days.” But not today... today she was going to forever bury her Rainbow. Slowly she rose and prepared to say yet another goodbye.
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Broken windows and empty hallways,
A pale dead moon in a sky streaked with gray.
Human kindness is overflowing,
And I think it's gonna rain today.
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Prue watched as the dead of night resurrected a lifeless dawn. The tears of heaven mixed with her own. Her blurred vision allowed her to see things more clearly than ever before. Her lack of external sight forced her to look to the internal visage of her soul. The picture wasn’t easy to look at but one she knew would never be erased.
“Oh Baby Girl, when did forever end? Was it when you said you loved me or when I just smiled back? Was it when you asked a favor or when I broke my word? Was it when you wrapped me around you little finger or when you were ripped from my loosened clutch? No forever came the day were born and ended the day you died! You were my life Little One and I will be forever lost without you. You were the Reflection of my soul and the day you went away my mirror was eternally shattered. When I looked into the glass of your deep brown eyes they always made me smile again.” But not today... today she was going to forever bury her Reflection.
Slowly she stood and went to join her family as they prepared to say yet another goodbye.
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Scarecrows dressed in the latest styles,
The frozen smiles to chase love away.
Human kindness is overflowing,
And I think it's gonna rain today.
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The community once again banded together in support of a family grieving the loss of one so young. For miles tree lined streets were decorated in ribbons of pink. Friends and strangers alike were affected by the tragedy that gripped the tightly knit neighborhood.
The cemetery’s chapel was filled to overflowing. Over five hundred mourners came to pay their last respects. The sea of faces held both the familiar and the unknown. The volunteers, who formed the search party, were now the people who formed the last three rows. The ‘on the street’ reporters who fought for the lead story were now the ones who fought back tears. The police force that led the tireless mission to ensure this story of a happy ending, were now going to be leading the funeral procession with a police escort. The kindergarten class was given the day off so they could say good bye to the friend of both the popular and the outcast. It was amazing how the impact of one so young could affect so many. The guests were handed a small packet of tissues along with the order of service as they headed to the pews that were adorned with delicate white clusters of baby’s breath.
The candles were the only source of light in the stone cold and sterile house of mourning. The vaulted ceiling was ushered heavenward by life sized angels with stoic faces. The organ pipes boomed out traditional funeral dirges that only added to the morbidity of the assembly’s darkened mood. The only color present in the marbled arched sanctuary was found in the front of the chapel. The granite steps were flooded with flowers and lined with countless stuffed animals. To the left was a montage of pictures chronicling the sweet life that was cut short far too soon. The mosaic narrative started with a photo of Patty holding a just born swaddle of pink and ended with the image that would always burn in the hearts of those she irrevocably touched. The beaming smile and sparkling innocence that graced the Bay area for just over five years was now forever extinguished.
Once Jack gave the funeral director the ok to begin, the organ was replaced by the soothing tones of the stringed quartet. As the cello and violins softly harmonized with the viola the young classmates from Baker Elementary proceeded to join their voices with the music as they sang with pride and honor Phoebe’s favorite song. The one her Mommy sang to her each night until the task was sadly passed on to Piper.
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Somewhere over the rainbow
Way up high
There's a land that I heard of
Once in a lullaby
Somewhere over the rainbow
Skies are blue
And the dreams that you dare to dream
Really do come true
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
Some day I'll wish upon a star
And wake up where the clouds are far behind me
Where troubles melt like lemon drops
Away above the chimney tops
That's where you'll find me
Somewhere over the rainbow
Bluebirds fly
Birds fly over the rainbow
Why then, oh why can't I?
If happy little bluebirds fly
Beyond the rainbow
Why, oh why can't I?
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As the classic tune echoed through the ancient hallowed hall the words took on a whole new meaning. Sniffs and cries could be heard above the sweet cadence of the eternal dreamer. Emily Johnson, Phoebe’s best friend, slowly made her way down the narrow aisle gently scattering pastel petals in her wake. She made it half way down the walkway before dropping her tiny basket and running to the comforting arms of her mother. Her words causing everyone’s heart to tear a little more. “MOMMY BRING PHOEBE BACK!!!” The director scrambled into damage control mode and ushered Jack and Andy forward. Steadily they marched the tiny cream colored casket down the center of the chapel. Its size only magnified the enormity of the tragedy, sending a tidal wave of tears through the crowd. The bittersweet aroma of roses filled the anguished air as the fresh petals were crushed under the weight of each step. Once the coffin was carefully in place the family of the deceased languidly made their way to the seats marked ‘reserved.’
Penny being the eldest led the procession. She remained stalwart and dignified even though the savage claws of Hell’s Grim Tyrant mercilessly crushed her weakened heart like a vise. But her physical pain was ignored as her emotional pain claimed all her attention.
At Prue’s silent request Piper went next. She had yet to stop crying; her eyes nearly swelled shut still continued to produce a salty waterfall of loss. Her head pounded, her heart raced and her stomach churned but her corporal discomfort was disregarded as her internal ache gripped all her attention.
Prue wanted to run, run as fast and as hard as she could. Her remorse and guilt mixed with her inexpressible sorrow were shouting to get the hell away, while her eternal love and loyalty was tenderly bidding her allegiance. Loyalty and love won out as she hesitantly followed behind her trembling sister. Prue stared straight ahead and allowed no eye contact to be made. She had yet to say a word since that awful night Mr. and Mrs. Trudeau broke the news of Phoebe’s death. Her head was held high, but her features remained an enigma. It was only in her eyes that one could read the embedded anger. The icy blue orbs shot fiery darts of fury at the invisible King of Terrors that demanded her baby’s sisters life. Her lake of sorrow was quickly turning into a storm of rage and her mountain of grief in to an avalanche of anger. But in classic Prue fashion, her skilled mask of ambiguity allowed no one to see into her soul. No one that is except Andy. As he stood in the near distance he knew the protective facade’s foundation was rapidly crumbling and he also knew that he would lovingly catch her when it collapsed.
Frankly none of the Halliwell’s remembered much of the rest of the service as Penny did her best to comfort a nearly frantic Piper and Prue was allowing her now displaced volcano of wrath to reach a dangerous level. The next thing any of them heard was the voice of Jack Trudeau.
“On behalf of the Halliwell family I would like to extend you their gratitude for all your efforts over the past few months and in upholding them with your presence at today’s service. The family would like to request your continued attendance at the brief graveside ceremony. This will be a time to say your condolences and goodbyes as well as participating in an active memorial for Phoebe Marie Halliwell. Once again thank you for all your kindnesses extended to the bereaved.”
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Prue stared out the tinted window of the black limo that carried them to the growing family plot. The rain was still relentless as it pelted the earth with tears. The thunder echoed its displeasure as it roared in anguished cries. The lightning protested the fate of one so young as it flashed in violent pain. Yet Prue’s eyes remained dry. Pulling up to the grave site she saw the huge green canopy that held numerous folding chairs and was spaced the appropriate distance from the earthen cavity that would be her little sisters final bed. Snapping her eyes shut she hoped to wish the scene away but knew that things like that only happened in fairy tales.
As Prue waited for the ushers to dismiss the guests row by row from back to front she flipped through the memorial bulletin and found a poem that caused the emotional outburst that followed.
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I Am Not There
Do not stand at my grave and weep,
I am not there. I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow,
I am the snow on the mountain's rim,
I am the laughter in children's eyes,
I am the sand at the water's edge,
I am the sunlight on ripened grain,
I am the gentle Autumn rain,
When you awaken in the morning's hush,
I am the swift uplifting rush of quiet birds in circled flight,
I am the star that shines at night,
Do not stand at my grave and cry,
I am not there, I did not die. ~Author Unknown
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All Prue could feel was out of control. Pain... Defeat... Loss... They all muddled together as her mind worked her up into a frenzy of temporary insanity.
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Pain.
The world is slow, heavy. Hard to breathe. Painful.
Pain.
Damp hair plastered against skin. Fingers no longer under control clawing at the ground in a feeble attempt to make the pain go away.
Defeat.
Bitter. Wrong. It wasn't supposed to be like this.
All wrong. Pain... Sword throbbing, grating.
Eyes hurting, burning. Are those tears? I never cried before.
Suddenly it's all so clear, so obvious. Only now, for the first time I understand.
Such irony. Here's to you, Fate. Surely there can be no force more cruel?
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Without permission or choice Prue rushed to the tiny casket that held the body she couldn’t even see. In one fell swoop she sent the grave blanket, atop the beloved treasure chest, nearly fifty feet landing it awkwardly at the distant gravediggers feet. Penny flashed a worried glance at Gail, wanting immediate assurance that the binding potion had not failed. Once her dearest friend nodded her security she returned her attention to the passionate release of grief exhibited by her eldest granddaughter.
Prue mercilessly pounded the coffin with her balled fists of rage, yelling at the one that she was really mad at. Phoebe.
“Damn it Phoebe you promised... you promised to never leave me!!! Don’t you remember? You even crossed your heart!!! YOU PROMISED AND NOW YOU BROKE THAT PROMISE AND I CAN NEVER FORGIVE YOU!!!!”
“I don’t want you in the winds, the mountain or the water I want you with me. I want you to follow me around until I scream in frustration, I want you to run to my room in the middle of the night and make me tell you stories until the monsters go away. I want you to make me take you for ice cream and beg until I give in. Don’t you see Pheebs I want YOU!! Not some crappy star or bird to take your place. I WANT YOU! I NEED YOU!! I NEED TO TELL YOU I LOVE YOU!!!!”
“HOW DARE YOU THINK I COULD LIVE WITHOUT YOU!!! COME BACK!!! COME BACK TO ME!!!!!!” The conversation was private but none were excluded from her anguished rant. Slowly she slid down the side of the coffin and crumbled to the muddied ground in a heap.
No one knew quite what to do. Penny stood frozen, Piper buried her head in her grandmother’s side and the rest stared on in blank confusion. Out of the midst of bodies came the one who would know what to do. Andy. Gently he too fell to his knees and cradled her quaking frame as he hugged her to him and whispered words from his heart. He pulled her face to his and kissed her tear streaked cheeks as his soft and loving lips brought her healing and she relaxed within his embrace. They both knew in that very moment that their fate as lovers was eternally sealed.
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Time stood still as each, who wished to do, so, said their last goodbyes. Once Penny and Piper had their moment alone Jack once again acted as moderator.
“If I could have your attention please. The attendants will be making their way around and handing out a pink colored balloon as you receive yours would you please begin to form a circle around the gravesite.” Once all the tokens were handed out and the crowd assembled Jack continued his instructions. “Attached to each balloon is a small card that reads:
To whomever finds this memorial tribute would you please perform a random act of kindness in remembrance of Phoebe M. Halliwell December 17, 1972 - August 12, 1977.
The family would like to release these in honor of Phoebe and as a symbolic way of ushering her into heaven.”
As the casket was starting to be slowly lowered into the grave, balloons were simultaneously freed. As they rose to the sky the clouds were miraculously parted creating a perfect circle of blue. One would like to think it poetic and that the angels fractioned the darkened billows and extended their arms to carry heaven’s precious gift home.
Penny offered a knowing smile and gave a teary wink to her daughter. Piper stopped crying and felt a quite calm replace her distraught spirit. But Prue still held on to the string, not wanting to let her baby go.
A small voice... one voice singing in the darkness began to grow louder as another one and another one joined in until the entire circle was harmonizing and beginning to heal.
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One voice singing in the darkness
All it takes is one voice
Singing so they hear what's on your mind
And when you look around you'll find
There's more than one voice singing in the darkness
Joining with that one voice
Each and every note another octave
Hands are joined and fears unlocked
If only one voice should start it on it's own
We need just one voice facing the unknown
And then that one voice would never be alone
It takes that one voice
All it takes is one voice
Shout it out and let it ring
Just one voice
It takes that one voice
And every one will sing
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When the last word was no longer able to be heard and the air was filled with a faithful tranquility, Prue smiled and let go.
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Right before me, signs implore me
Help the needy and show them the way
Human kindness overflowing
I think its gonna rain today
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Dear Readers,
Won‘t you too join the mourners and perform a random act of kindness for someone this week. All it takes is One Voice... And don’t forget to tell that special someone you love them... you never know when that chance may be forever taken away.
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